(a kinda xtian all-or-nothing fundamentalist view of human intimacy; ask my dog who’s lying across my left foot as i type)

but suppose we throw away the rule book (surely not!  it’s all been worked out long ago, hazznt it!).  after all, social mores are constantly in flux, am sure i read that somewhere.  let’s consider, then, if we might relocate Kissing to the end of Step 2, the step that follows Step 1, the Meeting.  since we do, when meeting, kiss the cheeks, brows, hands and sometimes the lips of an under-defined class of strangers from family to old girlfriends and best friends’ girls and who knows let’s start kissing anyone we like all right?!

let’s, if we’re reconstructing (and nudging) social interaction in a considerably more erotic evolutionary direction, be practical, which involves cool realism (for the highest purposes!) 
the Kiss, frankly, sociologically, can currently be considered a “soft target”, an “open target”, a classic double entendre that can
a) disguise itself a la urban guerrilla (to bypass Mental Brain say) while
b) infiltrating and thus establishing an astonishingly secure ‘network of contacts’ in the Emotional and Physical-Instinctive Centres, much nearer the Heart than Step 2 could ever normally expect to achieve.  hence, not even yet publicly known and certainly not acknowledged, it’s a quintessentially secure beachhead from which to mount further surprise (to the MB) advances. 

compared to that 1st kiss (the double-entendre lurking in Polite Society’s shadows & loins like the sunrise and the future) the 2nd must surely be a hundred times easier and more natural, indeed virtually undeniable, by which time alchemy should kick in if it’s going to and why shouldn’t it (once you’ve subtracted society’s current cognitive moral dissonance) and the 3^rd and 4^th should follow like embedded revelations being trip-wired till everybody’s cards are off the table!

by then i reckon it’s a smell thing as much as anything.  certainly it’s meta-darwinian survival, meaning it includes mere survival by sheathing one’s claws in Forever Time for the Love of All.


let’s actively imagine a 1^st kiss scenario...
it might go like this.  seated at a cafe table, just met, been talking about these matters because, well, because i noticed somebody at another table reading a book on Tantra (turned out it was Readers Digest but no matte!), which naturally led to a discussion on, well, Tantra, during which i said i was a neo-tantric which really meant (when she inevitably asked:) someone who “tries to explore whatever appropriate range of possibilities and fantasies that coincide in the lovers”, then, as she made comments, some of the above ideas got dropped in and thrown around for, say, a quarter of an hour, until i say, lightly:

“so, you know, if i see that the only way to freedom is by becoming a little freer every day, i mean it’s always been our right and now it’s a real possibility, then we not only can but we must make our own choices in everything that harms nobody, not the mechanical ones we’ve always thought we ought to make, but really looking for new openings into a freer world,,, like... like, for example, what little thing right now would you like to do if we were all really free, something that might possibly be just a LITTLE too far but then maybe not, how can you ever know if you don’t try, right? 

“like what i’d really like to do is lean over and kiss you on that lovely smile of yours, cos it feels right and happy and even healthy and that’s what the Real Me really wants to do, and it doesn’t attach any ‘super significance’ to it, or any promise in it, it’s just so two human beings can... get a little closer what’s wrong with that?!” (giving my cute wry smile that doesn’t lead with my bad side-teeth :)
“how would your Real Me feel about that?”

i reckon you don’t await a verbal response at this point.  that’s inviting her Mental Brain to consider it when her other 2 brains have hopefully already left it behind!  your real intent should by now have leaned you half across or round the table, with an arm (neutrally, naturally) reaching on to her shoulder :) 

i am not asking her, i am nudging her, us, in a more evolutionary direction.   [cont. below: conversation with mandrake links sex with money]
UP!  we have more conveniences, but less time

Passant
Paul Foster-Prankster, Hoggie, Poet, Commentator,
Programmer- passed away
Sunday evening.  Paul is memorableto all who read
Tom Wolfe's "Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test".
Was living in a tent outside of
Willets , California.
Sitting under an Oak, volume
of Shakespeare in his lap, uncharacteristically gone
in a whisper.
 We ran like young
gods, chasing what we
 could
never quite see.

 We eventually
influenced everyone under thirty
and


 We thought it
fair to destroy wisdom.

 
Paul Foster
 "The Answer
Is Always Yes"

UP!  we spend more, but have less

·       In 1846, the Polk administration sent U.S. troops into a disputed region along the Texas-Mexican border to provoke Mexico into firing the first shot in the Mexican War.

·       invented a form of binary code 500 years before the invention of the computer!

·       and used it as part of the world’s only 3-dimensional written language. 

the enemies within